You should read the following post, making the voice in your head that of comedian Lewis Black. I've toned down a bit of the language, as this is sort of a family show, or at least one that doesn't want to get their blog censored. That being said, I now say "On with the show."
If you don't follow the funniest blog I've seen (http://newlywedadventures.blogspot.com) .. (A hint as to who it is - the wife used to work with me)- I was tagged to write a 55 word story. And, I know how to write HTML, and yes, I could have made that a link, but I didn't. 55!
At any rate, now I have to figure out what the hell to write about. See, I'm not into that whole fangled English Bull**** like just about everyone that I've met from UofM. Communication is so overrated. And who the hell writes stories that short anyways? Well what do you know? I just did it.
What? That didn't count? It wasn't a story? Well what the hell did you want? Some sort of fable? Perhaps something with a moral? Maybe you'd like me to tell you a tale, a tale of a fateful trip? Or perhaps you're looking for a work of fiction? Can I do it in all questions?
So maybe you think I've cheated you. It occurs to me that some people wouldn't consider a URL to be a word. Or maybe the number 55 shouldn't count. Well here's a big **** ***! Do me a favor and copy and paste each of my paragraphs into M$word! Ha! Take that you ninny head!
Can I stop now? Do you really require one more? I mean, its not like its difficult to write a sequence of words that totals 55. Shoot- its down right simple. I've written all of those AND word counted them in under 15 minutes. And I didn't leave a single one of those sentances without
Yes, Virginia- the above was a joke. I'm so glad that you've caught on! Well, here we are. I'm going to write one more of these, and then end my post. And I'm not tagging anybody! Because I keep my hands to my self! Getting your grubby cooties on everything... ready for the last one?
He sat patiently, waiting for the opportune moment. Unsuspecting, she continued to ramble on about whatever it was she was talking about. He inched closer, ever cautious of what he was about to do, using misdirection to distract, she was oblivious to what was about to unfold for the umptienth time. NOW! "GOT YOUR KEYS!!!"
If you don't follow the funniest blog I've seen (http://newlywedadventures.blogspot.com) .. (A hint as to who it is - the wife used to work with me)- I was tagged to write a 55 word story. And, I know how to write HTML, and yes, I could have made that a link, but I didn't. 55!
At any rate, now I have to figure out what the hell to write about. See, I'm not into that whole fangled English Bull**** like just about everyone that I've met from UofM. Communication is so overrated. And who the hell writes stories that short anyways? Well what do you know? I just did it.
What? That didn't count? It wasn't a story? Well what the hell did you want? Some sort of fable? Perhaps something with a moral? Maybe you'd like me to tell you a tale, a tale of a fateful trip? Or perhaps you're looking for a work of fiction? Can I do it in all questions?
So maybe you think I've cheated you. It occurs to me that some people wouldn't consider a URL to be a word. Or maybe the number 55 shouldn't count. Well here's a big **** ***! Do me a favor and copy and paste each of my paragraphs into M$word! Ha! Take that you ninny head!
Can I stop now? Do you really require one more? I mean, its not like its difficult to write a sequence of words that totals 55. Shoot- its down right simple. I've written all of those AND word counted them in under 15 minutes. And I didn't leave a single one of those sentances without
Yes, Virginia- the above was a joke. I'm so glad that you've caught on! Well, here we are. I'm going to write one more of these, and then end my post. And I'm not tagging anybody! Because I keep my hands to my self! Getting your grubby cooties on everything... ready for the last one?
He sat patiently, waiting for the opportune moment. Unsuspecting, she continued to ramble on about whatever it was she was talking about. He inched closer, ever cautious of what he was about to do, using misdirection to distract, she was oblivious to what was about to unfold for the umptienth time. NOW! "GOT YOUR KEYS!!!"
1 Comments:
At 4:35 PM,
Kathleen said…
I am still laughing out loud! However, one might argue (if one were say, an anal-retentive English teacher) that you didn't write eight 55-word stories, but seven 55-word paragraphs, and then one 55-word story. Although, in the seventh paragraph, you only really have 54 words regardless (myself is one word, not two - muahahaha!).
And, I must say, that last story is hysterical, and one I know only to well! It has been some time since you have had the opportunity to steal my keys, but I have to say, I’m just blonde enough to always fall for it. Call me a glutton for punishment. All in 55 words. ;)
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