This is already tougher than I anticipated. I have moved into my apartment in Benton Harbor, Michigan, and just said goodbye to my wife as she headed off back home to Columbus. Outside it is raining heavily - so much that my sprint from Jessica's car to my apartment door- about 30 feet - left me soaked, and in need of a new change of clothes. Thunder and lightning are abound, and I am alone.

I have no TV, limited internet - I'm leeching from a neighbor who seems just close enough that I get a good signal for about 1 minute, then nothing for another few. I think he's in the next building over- I couldn't get internet while it rained super-heavily. I also get piss-poor phone reception in my apartment- sometimes no bars, sometimes one bar.

Lets talk about my apartment for a moment. I knew it wouldn't be a great looking place, but I didn't expect this. The complex is surrounded by an 8 foot tall fence topped with barbed wire. My parents showed up, said welcome to the hood, and then asked if there were any other places we could move me into. I'll post pictures later when I have consistent internet. I'm worried for my belongings. I'm considering taking my laptop to work for fear of my apartment being robbed while I'm away.

Its been 10 minutes, and I miss my wife like crazy. I'm worried about her driving home in this storm, worried that I'll need her this week, worried that I won't be able to cut it at my new job. I'm a nervous wreck inside.

And I need to stop. Because rational thought says that everything will be fine. Rational thought says that I'll be awesome at my new job, and that everyone there will like me. Rational thought says that despite me living in the projects (no- seriously- wait till I upload some photos!), I'll be fine. I drive a shitty car, keep to myself, and keep my head down. Rational thought says that there will be no time to miss my wife- I'll get up, go to work, talk to Jess on the way home (I have reception in my car), make dinner, go work out, and have about 2 hours left to myself. I have not brought a television, but have brought a lot of books and my guitar. Before I know it, it will be Friday, and Jessica is planning on coming up each weekend (10-12 weekends). She'll stay over until Sunday, and then head back to Columbus. (5 hour drive each way) I'd come down, except that we don't know if my car will make that trip that many more times, and it doesn't have any A/C or cruise control, making for a really unpleasant trip.

The point is, it won't be so bad.

Quick subject change: I'm re-comitting to a healthy diet and exercise. I fell off the wagon when I hit 210 pounds, and I literally stopped cold turkey. I ate a lot of ice cream, and stopped working out for the last few weeks. My goal is to get down to about 200 pounds this summer. (Thats about a 12 pound weight loss). I've got about 10 weeks where I won't be doing any baking, and my dinners will typically consist of grilled chicken, tilapia, a low-fat burger, or spaghetti. No desserts unless I'm with Jessica. My clock starts.... NOW.